The Journey of a Poem

I didn't set out to participate in the contest.

I just wrote a poem (if it can be called a poem), and decided to submit it to Poetry.com, because every poem submitted will be automatically displayed as a webpage, and I have already submitted a number of my previous works to the same website.

What I didn't know was, with that click on the "submit" button, I was embarking my simple poem on a journey of epic proportion.

***

The poem I wrote is as below:

What was it I have forgotten?
That laid buried in the garden--
Two fallen stars
Three drops of tears
And one page of a diary...

What was it I have forgotten?
That had fallen from heaven--
Two fair maidens
Three words unspoken
And one burden to carry...

What was it I have forgotten?
With which the heart was laden--
Two misty eyes
Three long farewells
And one broken heart to bury--

--In the garden
and in my scrambled memory...

I called it "Emorym", as in "scrambled memory". You know. And don't over-analyze it. Less than 10% of it is based on real personal experience. In most part, the words were chosen because they rhyme, and the number game was fun to play with. It does seem very broken-hearted, but like I said, words lie.

After submitting it, I received the following e-mail within the next couple of days.

It wasn't the first time I received such a thing; but previously, with the other works I submitted, I had received actual snail mails. Perhaps they sent e-mail, too, but for the previous works, I had submitted the poems under an old e-mail address that I had stopped using a couple of years back. So I have not realized what they could do - and probably had been doing - with e-mails.

Boy, was I in for a great annoyance.

***

What came next was something "exhilarating". It appeared that those o-so-mighty editors have found my poem worth publishing!

Wow. My poem. To be published in a real hard-cover tome. Man. How cool is that?

A-ha. If that is what you think, then you have fallen into their trap.

In fact, I did fall for it the first time, with the first poem I submitted to them: "Then and Now".

When I first saw the snail mail informing me that "Then and Now" was going to be published in a hardcover anthology, I was thrilled beyond measure.

That is, until I read further down and came to that part about "you are not obligated to make a purchase, but if you wish to keep this beautiful tome as a treasured personal collection, you can enjoy a pre-publication discount of...".

Man, the same old ploy that I had seen Reader's Digest used ever since I was a young boy.

The world-famous digest would come with a subscription form and a scratchcard that said something like "scratch to see how many stars you get; you will receive one mystery gift with every star!"

And if you really did scratch the card, you would find three stars (or whatever number was the highest), and you would think to yourself, Wow, how lucky I am! I have got to make a subscription so I don't miss out on the three mystery gifts I'm entitled to get!

But of course every scratchcard came with the maximum number of stars.

The same case with this poetry thingy. I'm sure every poem that does not belong to the "complete rubbish" category will be published. No sense getting too excited about that. It does not mean your poem is good. It simply means your language is passable.

***

Needless to say, I did not make a purchase.

But they are not one to give up easily. Next came a notification that my poem was certified as a semi-finalist in their USD 10,000 contest (I think that's the sum; can't remember exactly).

Boy. Wasn't that exciting.

But of course they would remind you about your having no obligation to make a purchase (now, if I am not obligated to make a purchase, why do you keep reminding me?), except if you want the book as a prized collection, blah-blah-blah.

I ignored the e-mail again.

***

Then the onslaught was raised a notch higher:

Wow. Editor's Choice Award. How many people will actually get that, right?

Wrong. I'll bet everybody gets that. =.=

Because, the bottom-line is, they still wish to remind you about your having no obligations blah-blah-blah:

But that's not all. After all, those poetic types have got very good imagination.

They figured that if you don't want a book with hundreds of pages of other people's poems outshining your poem, you would probably want a plaque with only your poem on it:

Imagine hanging your poem on the wall of your living room, for all visitors to see.

Ah... What better way to satisfy your vanity.

But the plaque ain't cheap, brother.

I could probably get a local trophy-maker to make one for me at a fraction of their price.

So it didn't really appeal to me.

But, again, that was not the end of it yet.

So, you don't want a wall display. Fine. How about a CD reciting your poem to your guests?

Yep. They have thought of everything.

And honestly, I was a bit tempted here. :-p

***

Nevertheless, I kept my head on and resisted the temptation. Come on, you can't really believe that your poem is among the 33 best poems submitted in that season. If you say no, they will just ask the next-in-line.

And I'm sure they did turn to the next-in-line.

***

First, it was the book, and then it was the plaque and the CDs; and to top it all, a USD 10,000 contest. You would think they will let you off after failing to hook you with all these temptations.

But that's where you are wrong!

If you have resisted vanity and greed for big prize money, it means you are the rational type who knows when something is too good to be true. Then they have another strategy for you: something good that is not too good to be true. Say, for example, winning an iPod.

*Sigh*. They will do anything for the sake of marketing. In this case, they are trying to get more hits at their website, so they can sell advertisements.

***

Meanwhile, their "Editor's Choice" story-line obviously had not come to the end yet.

After a while, I received another e-mail informing me that my poem had won the "Editor's Choice Award" (Thrilled, I'm sure. But you have already told me this).

What is different this time, is that they are actually going to give out "awards", in the form of a watch, a pin, or a commemorative coin.

But you have to buy them to award yourself. =.=

***

What is more annoying is the fact that each e-mail mentioned above had been sent more than once. Some more than three times.

And just when you thought you have seen everything, they sent you an e-mail with a blue mouse skipping left and right in front of you asking you to catch it if you can.

Whoever it was must have a PhD in the Science of Annoyance.